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Author Topic:   Getting Dad to Bathe
posted 12-30-2002 05:13 AM           Edit/Delete Message
I need help, any tips on getting my Dad in the shower. He refuses, keeps saying I took a bath or it's not bath day.
He smells but neither my sister or I are willing to just throw him in the shower.


posted 12-30-2002 05:24 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for GRM4LOVE     Edit/Delete Message
Hello Reend and welcome

that is a difficult one... does dad have alzheimer's? Is he embarrassed to have you bathe him? His dignity may be at stake. I think you would need to explain more. Has he lost his will to live? Does he need to be bathed in bed with a wash cloth? Is he afraid of falling or slipping? Are there proper grab bars or a chair for him to sit in the shower? You need to share more in order for us to offer the proper feedback.

Looking forward to hearing from you ..warmest wishes


posted 12-30-2002 03:21 PM           Edit/Delete Message
re: Dad's shower
I am 65 years old with hubby of same age. We find it hard also. Personally, I am just short on energy as all older people are. The years sap our strength. Hubby is in wheelchair (uses bath bench and hand-held shower) and has emphasema (copd in fact). We both have trouble getting started with baths. Bathing is just really hard, hard work for us.
Perhaps you could help by laying out anything that will be needed. If your Dad has breathing problems, it may even be subconcious yet, but the overhead shower will tend to suffocate him. He may need a hand held shower. Try making the suggestion of a shower early in the morning because he will probably have more energy. Also, if he likes to go out, perhaps it could come as a preparation for going somewhere.
God bless you for taking an interest in your Dad's life and caring about his needs.
As Prairie Girl said, we don't have enough information to be much help. However, thought I would share my experience anyway.
May God give you the strength, wisdom, and courage to care for Dad as he goes through the elderly years of his lifetime.


posted 01-06-2003 07:11 AM           Edit/Delete Message
Hi reend and welcome...

Ahhh boy can I relate to your problem..
my dad never bathed...when he was in the hospital with his first stroke and was bathed daily..WHAT a difference it made..
Once back home he refused to listen to me if I asked him to bathe, even trying to get him in the tub while visiting...
Most of his home care aides couldn't either...he'd make the usual excuses.."I just had a bath"(lies of course)..."There is no water"(lol)...he told me once that you don't know how it feels to have these young aides helping you take a bath(the dignity thing)...
Finally one aide was able to gain his trust using a sense of humor attitude and has been able to get him bathed weekly for quite a while now...my dad likes her a lot...she goes the extra mile...
If you are able to get home care in your area I would suggest you try a weekly aide for bathing...explain to them how he is and see if they know someone who has luck dealing with stubborness...it can make all the difference in the world, especially if he looks forward to their visit each week, as my father now does...

Hope this helped a bit...


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